So, as promised - note there are no longer time-sensitive promises in my posts - random comments on various topics.
#1 - returning to Ontario after years overseas...
There is always the flood of relief at feeling totally in control of your surroundings, comfort with people and scenery reacting exactly as anticipated, and joy at discovering forgotten pleasures or indulging awaited ones. This return was, however, different, as it involved long term planning, and the possibility of permanance. (Well, the scond return did, the first was more like a regular visit.) I have spent 10 weeks now, reflecting on my future. The struggle is this - relief work is tiring, often unrewarding, very lonely, and thrilling to no end. Staying at home is more expensive, not so lonely, unrewarding, and boring to no end. I decided that as long as there was a dilemma with no clear solution, it was best to keep happy those who love me most, and stay near them. This pessimistic view of life at "home" has not made it easier.
On top of this, there is the expected, but never predictable shift in relationships that takes place when time and space separate the related. So, I miss my new friends, bonds forged in the fires of trial and hardship while overseas. My friends in Canada are no longer all in Canada, and are certainly at a different stage than when I left them, as they should be.
Perhaps the most obvious thing to others, but surprising to me, is the changes in me. I view Ontario, and my home towns and communities in a different light now, because I am a different man - more aware of my surroundings, colder and less receptive, certainly less naive and less interested in the lives of bystanders. I guess living in Asian metropolises desensitizes you a bit to the "unwashed masses". In general, I have spent my time working seven days almost every week in October and November, between two low-income jobs, because it's better than having nothing to do (although less lucrative than the latter option.)
That is my posted take on Ontarian life. Oh, and it's cold a lot here. I forgot how much I dislike cold.
